A NUMBER OF THINGS
Toasterhead Lyrics

CAN'T FOOL ME
Hide behind false words no more
You're not getting what you hoped for
You try and take from us what we need
You call it justice I call it greed
Can't fool me


WAR MAIMS
Economy's slow let's start a war
WE DON'T WANNA FIGHT NO WAR
Turn 18 you're out the door
WE DON'T WANNA FIGHT NO WAR
Go to war and kill a stranger
WE DON'T WANNA FIGHT NO WAR
War's excitement thrills and danger
WE DON'T WANNA FIGHT NO WAR
FIGHT WAR NOT WARS

The government wants to drop the big one
WE DON'T WANNA FIGHT NO WAR
But the army won't let them spoil their fun
WE DON'T WANNA FIGHT NO WAR
They'd rather get some exercise
WE DON'T WANNA FIGHT NO WAR
With no regard for people's lives
WE DON'T WANNA FIGHT NO WAR
FIGHT WAR NOT WARS

Death and destruction is the army's game
WE DON'T WANNA FIGHT NO WAR
They all love to kill and maim
WE DON'T WANNA FIGHT NO WAR
We'll overcome them at any cost
WE DON'T WANNA FIGHT NO WAR
Our life and liberty must not be lost
WE DON'T WANNA FIGHT NO WAR
FIGHT WAR NOT WARS


BARREL OF SHIT
Fry your brains and snort some coke
Stumble around you're life's a joke
Pass the bong and take a hit
Let's play a game at Barrel of Shit
Defender, Pac-Man, Robotron
No sense of reality, your brain is gone
When you get drafted you'll be ready
Hold your gun nice and steady

Barrel of Shit
Suck my dick
We don't need your violent fix


GIRLFRIEND
Meet my girlfriend, her name is Sue
She's not too pretty, but she's better than you
When people see her, they say she's gross
But I'm the one who says it most

She's so ugly I'm ashamed
I can't stand to look at her face
Her body looks like it's been maimed
To be seen with her is a big disgrace

Meet my girlfirend, her name is Jill
Her teeth are greener than a dollar bill
She says to me "I love you honey"
I say "shut up bitch you're not worth the money"

Meet my girlfriend, her name is Cathy
When I'm with her, I'm not too happy
Her personality is not too nice
And her hair is full of lice

Meet my girlfriend, her name's Maria
The thought of her gives me diahrrea
We went to the zoo last Saturday
But all the animals were scared away


TOASTERHEAD
Why do they call you toasterhead?
Cause every night you wet your bed
Greasy flat-top filled with bread
Instead of flesh it's made of lead

Toasterhead, you a bitch
Sell your head and you'll be rich
Standing there playing your bass
While bits of eggo roll down your face
Toasterhead, you a bitch
Sell your head and you'll be rich

Toasterhead, bought at Brendle's
Don't comb your hair without insulated handles
Toasterhead, please do not swim
Unplug yourself or your chances are slim

Heating coils sticking out of your ears
Breakfast time is your biggest fear
Toasterhead, don't blow a fuse
It's sad that you put up with such abuse
Heating coils sticking out of your ears
Breakfast time is your biggest fear


U.T.B.
I'm 18 and finally of age
I'll go to Washington and be a page
In the Senate or House, I don't care
I'll be boofing with my congressman everywhere
Up the butt, up the butt, I want a congressman up the butt

I know the government gets nothing done
But the guys in D.C. sure know how to have fun
If Bushy George would let me I would never repent
Over getting up the butt with the president
Up the butt, up the butt, I want the president up the butt

Sooner or later they're bound to find out
There'll be a big scandal there is no doubt
I'll be real sad 'cause I'll receive no more cash
And I'll be looked upon by everyone as homosexual trash
Up the butt, up the butt, no more politicians up the butt
My whole life is in a rut, expos&eacuate; movie has just been cut
SELF-DESTRUCTION
Going to a show, I've got my chains
Gonna bang my head, inflict some pain
Ringing in my skull, my ears will numb
Head will explode, my kind of fun

What's the song they're playing, I can't tell
It doesn't really matter, if it's loud as hell

Roof starts to crack, walls falling in
There's no escape once they begin
Can't move my body, crowd's packed in tight
I've got no choice, I'm here for the night

Maybe this time I've gone too far
All I want ot hear is lead guitar

The singer screams, my eardrums bleed
Heavy metal music is what I need
Ringing in my skull, my ears are numb
Head is exploding, my kind of fun

What's the song thy're playing, I can't tell
It doesn't really matter, if it's loud as hell


JUSTICE FOR ALL
Hang 'em high or shot 'em dead
We want justice we want his head
We've got a committee trying to invent
The best method of capital punishment
You broke the law you criminal
Now you'll pay the price
You don't deserve a chance
To leave a real life
You'll live your life in a stinky cell
With a peter in your ass
And when you're ready to rot in hell
We'll turn on the gas
Shooting is messy, hanging obscene
The chair costs a lot but at least it's clean
Lethal injections are the in thing this year
But the greatest new method soon will be here
Crimes in the city it comes from the slums
But we can rid of the druggies and bums
Our tasteless new poison is what it's about
We'll slip it in the water and wipe the crime out
We know innocent people are likely to die
But we still would like to give our plan a try
Wipe out some crime and excess population
Work to make America a BIGGER STRONGER NATION


SKANK
Vomit in your drunken rage
Smash your heads against the stage
No one wants to see you here
No one wants to even hear...

About how you skank and skateboard
Get drunk and act so cool
Stop... look who's standing there
Why... do you act the way you do
Think... what your future has to hold
What will life be like if you live to be old?

No one wants to be near you
Can't be sure what you will do
It's sad your life is such a waste
No one wants to even hear...

I'm not trying to judge you
But look at some things that you do
No one wants to see you here
No one wants to even hear...


BIG BROTHER
George said in 1984 we would answer to Big Brother
Who would keep a watchful eye on us just like a loving mother
Malicious thought police would stop us if we leave the path
A gutless mindless follower is all that would be left
War isn't peace - freedom isn't slavery - ignorance isn't strength

Big Brother uses death squads to keep the third world safe
And collects all your dollars to fule the nuclear race
Death will be your sentence if you fight his mind control
He annihilates all obstacles to obtain his ultimate goal
War isn't peace - freedom isn't slavery - ignorance isn't strength

We won't live in a country where we're subordinate to the state
A government enforcing ovedience by means of fear and hate
Big Brother and the thought police may know your every dream
Live in fear of what you feel and keep your conscience clean
War isn't peace - freedom isn't slavery - ignorance isn't strength

Twisted mind and twisted heart
Tearing people's lives apart
Twist your mind and twist your soul
Left only under Big Brother's control


MOH
All you do is talk your shit
When people aren't around
Never have a nice thing to say
About anyone else
But when you're around those people
You'd think you were their biggest buddy
How can anybody know
What you really feel

Why don't you just shut up
No one wants to hear it
No one think it's that great
To make your friends look stupid


KILL SPREAD
KKK is big in our state
They love to spread their fear and hate
Klansmen and Nazis love their guns
Terror and pain are loads of fun

But it's not just the KKK
It's the USA
It's the men in blue
It's the government and you

They went to court for killing the communists
The all-white jury set them free
The jews and blacks are next to go
Stop the Klan before they stop you

It's true that our country is for the whites
The indians were first but have no rights
We killed them off, we'll kill the rest
Christian white people should show they're the best



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