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STUPID SONGS When I sing songs I sing about what I know But I don't know too much so I don't sing about nothing I get my words from reading TV Guide I steal all my solos from the Rolling Stones I like stupid songs I get my insight from watching Spiderman I learned a lot from Peter Parker about dealing with the world I pull my wire to the 20 Minute Workout I sure wish the guys in the band looked like that I like stupid songs ARGH FUCK KILL Bla bla bla bla Bla bla bla bla, etc. Argh...Fuck...Kill DIE SINNER DIE You have sinned so you must die Die sinner die You will bring on the red tide Die sinner die Jerry Falwell's god sez that war is good At least that's what they tell us and christians never lie You will hang in the park Die sinner die God's army will leave its mark Die sinner die We'll burn the fire of communism by lighting you on fire And then we'll roast jelly beans on the funeral pyre BEDTIME STORY Flesh and blood and splattered guts Dripping brains and radiation Everybody's mutilated Screaming missiles and burning babies This is just a bed time story to help you through the night Cause when you wake up tomorrow morning you're gonna have to fight MY GIRL Oh my girl she's a bit homely She's got a few fleas and a touch of the mange On fact she's so oh oh oh oh so god damn ugly Oh my girl she's got a big sticky tongue Four hairy legs and a big smelly cunt Her name is oh oh oh oh Lassie DOGFARTS One day when I was home alone Just me and the dog holding the phone I gave my pal a piece of cheese It was limberger the cheese that pleezes Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh he had to go Oo oo oo oo oo oo oo Number 2 Ar ar ar ar ar ar ar it was to far Or or or or or or or to the door There was shit and piss all over the place My dog Wallace had gone to pieces There was a revolting oder in the air It was limberger the cheese that pleezes INSIDE MY HEAD I don't think you understand Just where the fuck we're coming from You think that the world is bland And we're here to relieve the monotony I don't care what you think you can't see inside my head I don't care what you say you can't see inside my brain I tell you to pound you pud I tell you to kill your mother I tell you to rape your dog You might as well, you'll get no other WAKE UP AMERICA Wake up america Be a good american Buy american Pledge your next car to be american Oh what a bunch of shit Nazi propaganda Thanks to crap like that I've got a cruse missile in my backyard |
PROUD TO BE CANADIAN I'm proud to be a Canadian Pass me another beer I'm proud to be a Canadian Hold my seat while i take a piss Our prime minister sucks dogshit through his nose His ex-wife gets brown showers from Mick Jagger The only reason we live in fucking igloos Is our government makes a living licking shit holes I'm proud to be a Canadian Pass me another welfare check I'm proud to be a Canadian Hold my seat while i go out and ca$h it I'm proud to be a Canadian Pass me another eskimo I'm proud to be a Canadian Hold my seat while i fuck her up the ass hole STUPID WORLD Lisa washed her hair on Monday Lisa washed her hair on Tuesday Lisa washed her hair on Wednesday Lisa washed her hair in Thursday Then her husband noticed that her shampoo Had upset her pH balance Her hair was all dried out and frizzy So he shot the bitch and moved to the city Her husband got a job at a roller rink He tried to pick up chicks but he had a little dink He brushed his teeth with Aim but it didn't matter Nice fresh breath but his dink didn't get no bigger Oh what a stupid world KILL THE HOSERS Let's kill that kid cause he's a jerk Let's kill his friends cause they look worse Let's rape that chick cause she's a slut And we're real horny and we wanna get fucked RELIGIOUS BUMFUCKS It's getting late you're gonna die They're trying to scare us with their lies The 700 club is full of shit The evangelists can suck my dick I don't need religious bumfucks anymore Their paranoia is here to stay You all believe them anyway I hate buddhism I hate satanism I hate reaganism I hate religion 1967 It doesn't matter I've got a library I've got a swimmimg pool I drive the Lamborghini Dad drives the Cadillac Mom's got an MG I don't have a job I don't go to school I just sit at home I don't have to worry They have lots of money They won't let me starve In 1967 things weren't this good My daddy was a hippie Now he's a head of state I don't have no peers I don't know no queers It doesn't bother me I don't get in fights When I go out at night Coz my chauffeur is a killer I don't have to look When i want a fuck I just spend some money I get more allowance Than you fucking middle class bums will ever see |
I KILLED MOMMY I couldn't stand their attitude for another day They were trying to synchronize me so I blew them away My daddy was a bitch he screwed around with my dog and cat My mommy satisfied her thirst with a bag of urine I kinda liked my sisters friends Keep em fresh in the fridge Murdered the bitch with a baseball bat She was only five wadda ya think of that I knocked her down the basement stairs Then I burned off all her hair Mutilated her virgin body My mommy caught me and she tried to stop me I killed mommy with my automatic I'M MY OWN GOD I can do whatever I want Cause I am my own god Don't have to worry if it's right or wrong Cause I am my own god USED TO BE IN LOVE I used to be in love with the world Until I listened to the leaders words I used to hang around with the guys When they told me to split I fucking near died I used to be in love I used to go to the horror shows Now I don't bother cause I'm one myself When I go out the people stare Cause I look like a psychopathic killer I used to be in love SUICIDE It used to be a dirty word Something I would never say But now when I take a look at the world There couldn't be a better way I killed my mother when I was ten I fucked my sister with vaseline Hung my daddy with a telephone wire Now there's nobody left so I may as well fire THE IDIOT I'm an idiot and I don't care It doesn't bother me when the people stare My mind is blank I don't get confuzed Cause I can't think with a blown fuse I'm an idiot and I don't give a shit I can't read or write or tie my shoes The government pays for my food and my clothes I live in a big apartment building Low income family dwellings SCARED OF PEOPLE I'm scared of people really don't know why I nearly shit my pants when they look me in the eye I'm scared of people and I'm scared of you I'm gonna go inside and shoot some glue All this stress and all this strain Is too much for my little brain I'm insecure and paranoid I'm gonna get killed and I don't know when BLACK SABBATH Acting like black sabbath is lots of fun Their records sound so heavy when I turn them on I jump up and down and pretend I'm them I can almost make the change Tommy Iommi is my god His guitar solos have been osterized Ozzy Osbourne is so out in space That he'd probably love me if I pissed on his face |