On Driving.

In the US, we have a great system of roads and highways, and that rules. However, we have a very archaic system of assigning licenses and privleges to usuage of roads and that blows. The purpose of roads is to increase commercial and industrial output. However many bad drivers are compromising this by driving very shittily and causing a lot of accidents and deaths =( . The solution is simple. Instead of taking a driving test and getting a license, certain people can try to take a more advanced driving test and receiving an Ultra AAA license. This license would entitle one to drive at least 20 mph hour above posted speed limits. This may sound bad, but its actually very progressive. If you’ve ever seen a sign on the road that said, Dial #77 to report aggressive driving, you know in your head something is a little wrong about that. It’s like a teacher reporting a smart kid for being smart. Aggressive drivers are good drivers. They have to drive like that because bad drivers can’t drive properly. I am much more worried by shittier drivers who have no road awareness than elite drivers who can maneovre an automobile with such finesse. Shitty drivers drive in the left lane on the highway and back everyone up. If they stick to the right most lanes, they are fine and can get into accidents amongst themselves. However, when they start driving in the left lane, they end up taking out elite drivers and just piss everyone else off. If only elite drivers were allowed to drive in the left lanes, it would create a utopian driving situation in which an incarnation of the Buddha himself would surely manifest.

Driving in New Jersey is bad enough, but with all the cops discouraging elite drivers, it just makes things worse. I have a few suggestions:

Police should go after shitty drivers. Shitty drivers can be identified by the following:
~ Behind them are anywhere from 3 -- infinite cars backed up and trying to pass but can not because they are boxed in.
~ They are so stupid they have no awareness that there are other drivers on the road, and they suck so much that it creates a vacuum so intense, light can not escape.

Things to keep in mind:
* If you are an elite driver, or have enough practice and might be ready to drive on the elite level (playing video games is excellent practice, btw), ways to avoid backwards law enforcement are as follows:
* If you see trees on the highway, there is a chance that there are cop(s) waiting on the other side. Try to see ahead, and if you can’t, just slow down; you can always speed up as soon as you pass the trees.
* A major key that people neglect, is that if the middle lanes are open, you can speed rather safely in them. If you stay in the left lane and speed and no one is in the right lanes, you are tripling your liklihood of getting pulled over.
* Another place that cops like to hang around are near bridges and underpassii, and if you go far away from New Jersey (civilization), they tend to be near rural sprawl (Utica).
* Another thing to keep in mind, a cop will not just have his radar gun, measure your speed and chase you. Most likely, he’ll measure your speed, radio ahead to the next cop and tell him/her to be vigilant for you. If you happen to speed pass a cop and only notice his presence after the fact, do not panic. Get into the right lanes and go slower, or get off at the nearest exit, or install Kit from Night Rider in your car and just drive your car off the nearest bridge (the voice of Kit was Mr. Pheeney, btw).
* One more thing is that it is good to try and watch the behavior of truck drivers. They have those radar detecting things and they talk with each other a lot. If you pass a truck, the driver will ALWAYS peer down from his cab to see what you are doing/look down your shirt. That is a fact. You can use this golden oppurtunity to communicate with him. If you are behind some trucks, you can just observe their acceleration behavior and adjust yours accordingly. Also, it is recommended to observe convoys of trucks whenever you get a chance, because they also happen to be one of the most beautiful sites in nature and you don’t know if you’ll ever get to see one again.

One thing to be aware of, however, is that if you are not an elite driver, please do not attempt to drive like one until you truly are elite. Nothing makes me more sad, then when I’m driving and I see an accident and an ambulance and stretchers. My heart definitely breaks, and it will definitely break if a potential elite driver tries to drive elite prematurely, so make sure you at least beat Grand Tourismo first, and/or drive on Route 22 for more than 10 minutes and not get in an accident before attempting to drive Class AAA.